Monday, January 2, 2012

Hazy Vision and Shifting Sand

It's January 2nd. I haven't blogged since December 23rd. Kind of been out of the mental loop. But I'm back, and it's January 2nd, so it's time for my annual personal vision-casting post.

However, I'm having a hard time finding a vision for this year. I really don't know what's coming. With Hubby looking for a job, everything's in limbo. Limbo's a difficult place for an obsessive planner like me.

OK . . . a moment of self-revelation . . . I have, in the past, been an obsessive planner. It's part of my nature. God has given me many gifts, but spontaneity is not one of them. I don't like surprises, I don't like feeling unprepared, and I don't like "going with the flow". But life tends to be a go-with-the-flow kind of affair. You can't plan for everything (hubby's job situation being a case in point), so I have become much better over the years at taking things as they come and living with uncertainty. This is good. Always nice to recognize growth in myself.

But I still don't like limbo. It's like walking on shifting sand. In my head, I know there's solid rock under there, but instincts still react to appearances. And the future appears hazy, at the moment.

Nevertheless, we are who we are no matter where we are or what we're doing, so I can still cast a vision for 2012. When New Year's Day 2013 rolls around, my hope is that Hubby has a job that fulfills him, that uses his gifts well, that fits God's purpose for his life. I hope that my girls have friends and activities that give them joy and growth opportunities. I hope that I will be accomplishing God's purpose for my life, whether here in Siouxland or somewhere else. And I hope we all have grown closer to each other and closer to God.

And I hope I'm sleeping well.

Oh! And to toot my own horn for a moment . . . I met my goal this year of consistently wearing a size 10 again! Yay for me! Always nice to recognize growth in myself.

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