Full disclosure: I’m
a homeschooler, and a former public school teacher. And I know the
reputation that homeschoolers have in America of being wacked-out religious
fanatics trying to shelter their children away from reality. I’m not going to deny that there of some of
those out there, but I hate that they have become the face of homeschooling,
because homeschooling is a WONDERFUL thing that I think more people should
honestly consider. And I’d like to offer
three scenarios in which I think you – yes, you – religious fanatic or not –
should give some serious thought to bringing your child home and teaching him
yourself.
1. If the school is
not adequately meeting your child’s educational needs. This is a more common scenario than you might
think. Parents often operate under the
assumption that the trained professionals should know best how to help their
child learn. They forget that the
trained professionals have scads of children to deal with every day; that they
only see them in the very unnatural, structured environment of the classroom; that
they are limited in the time and resources they have to offer each child; and
that they don’t know and love your child like you do.
Remember the old learning curve – the small percentage at
the top who excel, the small percentage at the bottom who fail, and the large
mass in the middle who muddle by? I’m
convinced that the muddling mass in the middle could be excelling if they were
taught in a way that works with how they learn – and the failures as well. Maybe you’re satisfied with the progress your
child is making . . . but maybe you shouldn’t be. Maybe you could do better.
2. If your child is
five years old. Or six. Or seven.
I’m going to reveal a personal bias here: I think we start formal education much too
early in America. I read an article a
while back about the public school system in Sweden (or was it Norway?),
touting it as one of the most progressive and effective in the world – and children
don’t start school there until they are seven. Ever notice how many American kids hate
school by 3rd grade? Maybe
there’s a reason for that.
Young children don’t need to be “doing school” to be
learning. They’ve been learning since
birth. In fact, they learn far more effectively
in an informal setting (and enjoy it far more, which may be even more
important). If you’re an involved
parent, you’re probably already giving them a better learning environment at
home than they would get at school. And remember: we’re talking about kindergarten and first
grade, folks. Nothing too
difficult. Yes, you can teach your child
to read – you potty-trained him, didn’t you?
You got books and advice from other parents and you figured out how to
do that; you can figure out the reading thing as well. Very few kids have special issues where they
need trained educators to get them to read (although many, MANY kids simply
need more time and less pressure . . . which they don’t get in school).
3. If your child is
turning into someone you don’t recognize or like. I wrote earlier about my daughter’s and my
impressions of what the school environment can do to kids. I never cease to be appalled at the stories
my daughter tells me of the behavior of her classmates (and neither does
she). Much of this is learned behavior. Too many parents, I think, watch their
children disintegrate into social, emotional, and psychological messes, feeling
powerless about the whole situation.
They forget what powers they have.
And one power is to remove that child from the environment that is
feeding the disintegration.
Before I became a parent, a mother at my church told me that
her son had asked her to homeschool him for his sophomore year of high
school. After a personal spiritual
awakening at church camp that summer, he realized he was in a bad crowd at
school. He knew if he went back, he would fall right back into the behavior he now knew was destroying him
– that he didn’t yet have the self-control to protect himself. He asked her for one year at home to build
his strength before facing it all again.
I found that remarkable. Not many
teenagers (and almost no children) have the self-awareness and maturity to pull
themselves out of a destructive place.
They still need their parents to do that. We need to find the wisdom and courage to do
it. We’re the grown-ups, after all.
I would be the last one to say that every parent needs to homeschool . . . but I would be the first to say there are many parents who don't who probably should. Yes, it is hard, but if you wanted an easy life, why did you have kids? Most paths with great reward are hard. They are also rarely regretted.
1 comment:
Nicely articulated, Gwen.
I really enjoy hearing about the experience of homeschooling families. I considered homeschooling my son. I'm not a fan of the "traditional" model of education. I put him in part-time Montessori pre-school at 3 because I needed to work some. We lucked out with an opportunity to send him to public Montessori elementary school. He started Kindergarten last week, and he loves it. Until that blessing came along, I was beginning to lie awake at night, worrying about how he would do in a traditional public school environment. I couldn't afford not to work, but feared the impact on my son. I'm hoping that I will have more financial flexibility as he gets older. I would love to homeschool one day. Our public middle school options aren't what I would hope. My wish may come true.
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