Monday, June 24, 2013


There is a Catholic tradition about a place called Limbo.  Because I'm not Catholic, I don't know much about the theory, but as I understand it, this is a spot in the spiritual world where souls go to after death when, for whatever reason, they are not destined for heaven but also not destined for hell.  Apparently, they have to hang out here for a while until their eternal destiny is determined . . . by what means, I'm not sure.  But it is an in-between place -- where you are neither here nor there.  There is no Biblical basis for a belief in such a place, so I don't believe there is a Limbo in the afterlife.

But I know there is a Limbo on earth.  I'm living there.

Our family had plans to leave Sioux City for San Antonio permanently at the end of this week.  But we had a family conference last night (via Skype for hubby, who is in New York this week for some kind of training) and decided to put that off until the second week of July.  Our house here hasn't sold -- we don't have a house there -- we have no specific reason to be there until drama camp for the youngest the third week of July . . . so we'll wait here.  In Limbo.

Not that I dislike Sioux City.  It's just that we've been mentally preparing to leave for a year and a half now, and "socially" preparing for a couple of months (dropping out of things, cutting ties, saying goodbyes), and I've been physically preparing for the last week or so since we got back from our trip to SA.  And now we're going to sit for a while.

Frankly, I don't know what to do with myself. 

My eldest said to sit and relax.  Treat it like a vacation.  Well, maybe I'm weird, but I can only "sit and relax" for so long before I feel like a worthless slob. 

It almost feels silly.  There has to be plenty of stuff I can do to entertain myself for the next two and a half weeks.  But I think that's the problem -- I feel like I'm wasting two and a half weeks of my life searching for "entertainment".  Is there something wrong with me?  I don't know.  I just want to move forward with life.

But apparently God has other plans.  Okey dokey.  I'll deal with it.  It just gets awkward saying "good-bye" to people again and again when they see you and thought you were already gone.  You start to feel like the boy who cried wolf.

There's a reason.  Surely there is.  I just gotta find it.

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