Not Ready for Simon Cowell

Wow -- haven't blogged in a week. I've been busy dancing and writing. My dance teacher started a cardio dance class that I enjoy -- and need -- but it takes up two of my morning "free periods" each week. And I've been writing dramas: skits for church services in the next couple months AND finishing up "Pilgrim's Progress" for the homeschoolers, who audition next week.

But I haven't been too busy to watch American Idol. :) I'm really going to try hard not to get so hooked on it this year, but with my girls watching it all the time, that may be difficult.

These early rounds aren't as addicting to me as the later ones are, probably because I haven't become attached to anybody yet. Keith, on the other hand, thinks the early rounds, with the really bad singers, are the only interesting thing about the show. They can be entertaining, for sure, but I also hate to see people being crushed and made a fool of, even if they're making fools of themselves.

I read that the auditions in front of the judges which we see on television only come after two or three other rounds of auditions in front of producers. When these people are called in to sing in front of the judges, they are told, "Some of you are here because you're really good; some of you are here because you're really bad." Apparently they're not told which category they belong in, and judging from some of their reactions, many of them are quite mistaken in their assumptions.

That's one of the fascinating things to me about these early rounds -- how so many of these people are so dreadfully deceived about their abilities. I mean, to be that bad, and to honestly think you were called to audition because you were among the cream of the crop . . . how can one be SO very self-unaware?

Personally, I don't think I would ever be in that position. I doubt my abilities all the time. Even when I have a lot of people praising my skills in an area, I always suspect that they're just being nice . . or that they don't really know what they're talking about. Any REAL actor would do a Simon-Cowell-eye-roll at me on stage. Any REAL teacher would give me the Kara-DioGuardi-"sweetie-I'm-sorry"-brush-off. Any REAL writer would do the Randy-Jackson-"for-me-for-you-naw-man" response, even if he had "mad love" for me.

I'm trying to decide if this attitude of mine shows appropriate humility or inappropriate diffidence. If it has served me well or held me back. I know that it has taught me over the years to not expect profuse praise, so I don't make it my ultimate ambition to get that praise -- which is good. But it may have also kept me from taking some risks that I thought I wasn't up for.

Hmm. I'll have to watch that in myself this year.