Sunday, February 8, 2009

The Sexy Post -- Not For the Kids

Keith has noted (as have I) the dramatic reduction in comments to my blog posts lately. I just figured everyone was busy, or out of the habit of checking their friends' blogs on a regular basis. Keith, however, suggests that I need more sex and violence in my blog.

O-o-okee dokee then.

It has occurred to me lately that as I've aged (ooh, that sounds ugly), my idea of what is sexy has changed, too. I look now at the celebrities I used to drool over -- Tom Cruise, Val Kilmer, Brad Pitt -- and I'm much less than enthusiastic. Mainly because most of them have all but imploded before the world or proven themselves to be jerks. Sad, sad.

Also, I've been getting in touch, via Facebook, with a lot of friends I haven't seen since '86 . . or '83 . . or even '80. And I look at these guys' profile pictures and think, "NOO! That CAN'T be him!" But then as I get used to seeing them, I think they don't look bad at all. In fact, in many cases, they look better!

So here's a list of stuff that I find sexy these days that I never thought sexy before.

Gray hair. Absolutely. My husband's family sometimes teases him about his grays and hints about hair coloring. I always emphatically tell him to ignore them. I like his gray hair. I think it makes him look distinguished.

Wrinkles. Not huge folds across your face, but the crinkles around the eyes and mouth when a guy smiles -- again, quite distinguished.

A bit of extra weight. Again, not folds and folds of fat. And I don't have anything against a fit body, obviously. But a lot of guys look better with some extra fat in select spots to smooth the angularity of their faces and bodies. A bit of a belly does not detract from a man's sexiness. What does detract . . . self-absorption and pride in washboard abs. Yawn.

Baldness. When it is worn well. There are some sexy bald men out there. (Of course, I do note that my husband has a full head of hair still -- as does his father twenty years his senior -- so I don't expect to have to deal with this one.)

Facial hair. This isn't necessarily a factor of growing old, but I didn't use to care that much for it. I mean, some guys really benefitted from some hair on the face, but many really did not. I have much more of a fondness for a fuzzy face these days. Keith stopped shaving the month he was between jobs this summer, and I loved it. Especially because it came out all salt-and-peppery. I wished he could have kept it. But he thought it might not be a good idea to start a new job looking that much different than he did at interviews . . . said maybe he'll try to grow it again later, after they're convinced they want him no matter what he looks like.

Charm. OK, charm has always been sexy, but now even more so. Guys really don't have to be good-looking for a woman to find him attractive. Sexiness is complicated for a woman -- as is sex itself. (Poor guys -- you gotta feel for them.)

Having said all that, I still contend that I married the sexiest man around. And I don't just say that because he reads my blogs and pays my mortgage. :) Love you, hon!


Julie W. said...

Wow! look at me post.

I agree with you Gwen on several issues (except the bald part). I think Paul is more hadsome today than when we met. I like his silver hair. Even though their are some wrinkles showing up around his eyes, they still sparkle when he looks at me, it still gives me goosebumps! The eyes have not changed! I think holding hands is sexy too. When we were in pre-marraige classes with the pastor he asked how we saw our realtionship 50 years from then and we both agreed that we thought the most of couples who would still hold hands when they were seniors. Since then we have considered holding hands as a way to say we love each other. I love holding Paul's hand, I thinks it's sexy, I feel loved, close and connected.

Robin Shreeves said...

I'd add being able to fix things as a very sexy trait.


Understanding that sometimes I just need to get out with a girlfriend, and making sure I'm able to do that - that's sexy too.

I'm kinda partial to those wrinkles around Brian's eyes, too.

Meredith said...

I'm still reading all your posts, Gwen! Distracts me at work ;)